Day One Thousand Two Hundred and Three

I only play make- believe when necessary.
This may have killled all the world's joys, not this world's though.
No, not today, not one.

I don't remember the last time I visited you. It was autumn I'm sure.
I only like it when the leaves the turn to colors, green insults me.
All those trees dancing in the wind, they mock me.
Green plants, I know their crimes.
Though you say their safe, I know what they take from me.

I saw you carressing them a day when the sun was burning them.
I wished they turned to ashes sooner, but you saved them with a kiss.
A kiss, that was suppossed to be for me.

Instead, your steady hand kindly brought the leaf to your lips.
I saw you smile, your eyes were wide, and your cheeks pink.
You didn't see me. On sunny, green- leafed days, you never see me.
I only wished to save you once.

But today, you escaped with all the plants and flowers to another land.
A grassy one, where you leaped and frolicked and smiled. You danced in the heat of the sun.
I looked up from my window, and I saw you, there dancing, deceived.
You mistook that carpeted floor for a field, and colorful couches for lilies, lilacs, and daisies.
The breezy air was only your cloud of smoke, and the sun turned all your goodness to sin.

I just found out that autumn has also brteayed me.
For I saw you joying with brown and red leaves too.
You danced amiss falling orange leafs as they landed solftly, once again, on your lips.
And before I could save you, you were gone.

It only broke my heart that you never truly left.
You were chained to your wooden chair. When you rocked in it, you dreamed.
If only you knew how I loved you, that I could love you.
That I could take you to another world with me.

I have now resorted to loving winter.
I have hated the spring. It is a devil that promises new leaves.
From now on I will love only the snow.
I should mention that I hate the cold, but to have you here, to love you near,
I will love it and wish it on us forevermore.