I Finally Had it: My Rant Against the World

Ever get sick of people telling you what you should like? I feel that way a lot of the time. Come to think of it, I've been feeling that way for a few years now. First came my frustration with church and their constant advising that I shouldn't like secular music, dancing, any kind of drinking, movies, media, magazines, etc.

Later, I became frustrated with church leaders telling me how I should believe the bible, what interpretations I should like. They ordered me to love homosexuals, but to disprove of their actions and feelings and oppose anything they attempted politically. They told me to vote republican, to vote against gun control, (and my personal favorite) for stricter immigration laws, especially the kind that would kick those law breakers back to where they came from. Then, I voted for Obama. I had a good friend yell at me about my terrible evil decision (although McCain literally made me shiver).

Education liberated me. I was appalled when I began attending a church that OPPOSED education, especially the ministerial kind. So I left. Then I attempted another, and in a very indirect and subtle way they pointed out that because I was brought up Pentecostal, and had a Pentecostal degree, I might lack Biblical education, so before I could join the ranks I needed to catch up and do more homework. Ayyyy!! Last thoughts on the church: music equals worship, Bible is not open for all kinds of discussion or questions, and God likes routines and prim and proper cookie cutter things (like the Pharisees).

Moving on. I got married, and I soon learned I didn't like the right kind of music. Top 40 songs are all trash. Everything sounds the same, and the music I like is lame. He's my husband, and after a brief discussion that his music taste was also weird and out there, we compromised. He would try to like mine; I would try to like his.

Then, out of nowhere I find out, I'm not treating the earth right, and I need to be more green. I need to get myself a bike, get some hemp clothes, get into folksy style music, eat organic, become vegetarian, recycle, and my food needs to be bought from three places: Trader Joes, Whole Foods, or Raisin Cane. If fast food is what you want: Northstar. I learned high fructose corn syrup was my greatest enemy, hot dogs were just evil meat corporations out to get me, and salt was one ingredient away from being rat poison. To top it off, I watched an educational film about the evils of meat corporations, evils of vegetable & seed corporations, and the evils of corn. OH NO NOT THE CORN!! (sarcasm!)

Now I have job, and I take too much time with my customers but I give them quality service. So I shorten my time, but now my quality suffers. So pretty much give them the highest quality in the least amount of time.

So far, the only good thing I have left is California. Home. The only things I do right are cook, clean, and be Latina. Although my mom let me know a month ago I have not yet mastered ironing. My make up gets lots of compliments and my hair too. No one bugs me about my slim figure anymore (thank God!). For some reason, everything I like or do around this place is wrong, or bad, or not good enough. I feel so much pressure, but I can't cave. I tried, but I can't. I am too strong willed and self assured. I love myself too much, and I always always try to stay true to myself no matter what people try to tell me. I feel like any moment I'm going to explode. Everyone and everything keeps trying to direct how I should feel, how I should act, what I should like. They all want me to be like them. Can I just say: You're NOT Unique!! You've all fallen into the terrible pattern of ignorance where you base your choices off of what everyone is doing, what the media is telling you!! Tell me why these people (church people, hippies, hipsters, music aficionados, leaders and politicians) all seem to fall into the latest fads. They always seem to have the latest technologies (mind you ministers don't reallly need an ipad & an iphone 4). They purchase more expensive stuff for things that are especially marketed to them (like Christians with Chick- fil- A, and hippies with the green aisle at Target). Can everyone just STOP. Stop telling me who I need to be. I know who I am, and I don't need to be anyone else.

God gave me freedom not just from the law, but from this world. He gave me wisdom to discern what things are good and what things are bad. He gave me faith to believe that He is graceful, and that even if I'm imperfect He still loves me.

So world, please stop trying to slave me to your pattern of thinking. If you choose to live your life that way, I respect that. But please, respect my decisions too. Just because I eat McDonald's fries, dance to Ricky Martin, and voted Democrat does not make me less than you. When I think you're getting gypped for buying Organic soap, attempting to earn holiness through prayer (only Christ can make you holy, you can't earn it, its a free gift), being merciless to people who are struggling, and pick a boring song to listen to, I just respectfully stay silent because that is what you have chosen in the freedom Christ has granted you. And though I may deeply disagree in some things, I just pray that God will help you see that. Please trust that God will do the same with me. For now, keep your condescending, self-righteous, and strong opinions to yourself. Lead by example and love. If you keep telling me how wrong I am about something based on your opinion, I'm just going to assume that you think you have all the answers and let it go. Sorry to be harsh, but all this has been building. I feel like a shaken soda can (soda is evil too), and someone just about cracked the lid.

I’m beginning to feel jaded and feel like I’m living in a time where nothing we do is sufficient and right. Everything we eat is unhealthy, and living for Christ is not good enough. My soul is weary! I just want to rest in thought that God will guide me and that I am made to His image. I just want some room to breathe and be who I am, who God has shaped me to be.

So my response: I drink moderately and occasionally with family, dance with my husband when I hear a beat, watch movies and shows I like, and subscribed to Cosmo and titled it “the monthly couples activity book.”

I believe that the Bible is absolute, but the interpretations can be questioned, explored, and relevant. I love homosexuals, no I don’t want to change them, and no I don’t believe we should treat them less than human beings and vote against them. I’m sticking to Obama, I want more gun control, and I want to legalize immigrants.

I don’t think I need more education, as mine was sufficient and fine thank you. I WILL NOT worship God only to “worship music” or any music at all for that matter, and I will not follow a prim and proper routine as I plan to discuss and ask as many Bible questions as I please.

I will listen to Fallout Boy, Lady Gaga, Ke$ha and anyone else if I desire it. If it sounds good, and I like it, I will listen.

I’ll try and help the earth (because I WANT to), and I’ll eat how I continue to eat: Hispanic. I don’t care where the meat came from because I’m just grateful that I have it. I buy what I can afford, and yes I do crave McDonald’s and Jack in the Box and when I crave it, I’ll eat it. High fructose corn syrup is made from corn and it makes my bread taste delicious. So what if salt is one ingredient away from being rat poison, humans are 2% away from being monkeys. I don’t like hot dogs and pizza anyway. I’ll eat food with flavor like my momma taught me. As for corn, don’t mess with my corn tortillas, tamales, covered in mayo/cheese/& butter, bread, pudding, atole…

I’ll give my customers quality service and mom, I hate ironing, that’s why Jared does it. I’m gonna go off now and drink my homemade strawberry juice. And that’s that. I love you mom! :P