Believe, Belive

Belief.
It's as much as I can give right now.
Is it enough?
Tell me it suffices.
Because as much as I can do right now
Is to breathe
Is to believe

If all I am is surviving
Then surely believing
Is all.

Faith.
It's as much as I can give right now
I can't think, or feel, or know anything
Pain is blinding
Misery has left me bare, stripped.
And I hold on to you
With all I have left
Life, faith
Belief.

Jesus, son of God
You Are.
Please say it is enough
Please say it is Enough.
Please say It Is Enough!

...for now.

-Noemi Garcia Rigsby

I Rather Feel

For the first time, in a long time
Silence beckons me.

I don't wish to speak
Or be moved to tears
I can't say what hurts
Except that its everything.

And my only prayer
I only beg,
that please,
I may not become apathetic.

God I pray, don't let me stop feeling
Apathy, my Lord, feels like death.
Only worse than a ghost.
I am alive, but dead inside.

I feel anger,
I feel pain,
I feel betrayal,
I feel pressure,
I feel misery,
I feel grief,
I feel loneliness,
I feel homesick,
I feel helpless,
I feel lost,
I feel desperate...

And while these feelings mold themselves together
Into a mush of miserable fools
God, at least I can still feel.

And that alone, is my only comfort.

-Noemi E. Garcia Rigsby