More Like Myself

Can I be different for a change?
For all you know, you don't know much
And the one you met is not as such.

Can you blame me,
If I want to be more like myself lately?
Will you judge me if I allow myself to show
All the colors, all the voices, all the emotions and the soul?
Because I've felt more like dust lately
Settling in the crevices of the likely
And blowing in the direction of the ordinary.

Would you be angry if I didn't apologize?
If every once in a while I declined?
If some days I said I had enough
Would you get mad if I was a little rough?
Because I'm weary of saying yes
And being left here with a mess
Only because you came before I
And no one did care if I died-
Or not.

Can I be more like myself lately?
Will you hear me just for me?
Will you not ask that I give up some pieces
And allow me to live with a little peace?

Can you see me resting upon your belongings?
Settling, gathering, provoking allergens
I can be cleaned away, thrown away
You never allow me to fully stay
But why go so far if I'll never fade?

Just let me become something more
Than your ruins, your neglect, your "what for?"
If you'll take me, I'll become me
And if you reject me, I'll still be becoming
Because, for once, I'll do what I need to do
To shed the old me, and become something new.

-Noemi E. Garcia Rigsby